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" That we understand this sentiment should come as no surprise. After a break-up, however, things are neither "safe" nor predictable.

We're not only dealing with a painful recovery process, but we're also wondering if we'll ever have a satisfying relationship – or whether we'll be able to love or be loved – again.

Coping with divorce and the prospect of intimate sexual relationships thereafter is like having each foot in a different camp: which deserves the most attention?

According to Jill Fein, a certified Imago relationship therapist and LCSW practicing in Lincolnwood, IL, some people want to get right back on the horse after splitting up with their spouse – and the sooner, the better.Alternatively, you could use your sexuality as a vehicle to act out your anger and to regain a sense of control, or as an attention-getting device, attempting to repair your damaged self-esteem.A woman who has been left by her spouse often loses much of her self-confidence and self-esteem, notes Toronto-based individual and marital therapist Karen Solomon-Ament.And that won't happen until you and your ex can agree to stay out of each other's beds.Sharon admits to having an on-again, off-again affair with her ex-husband, Dave, for four years after they split up.